No two families alike, especially no two divorcing families.  So parenting plans will differ, depending on the size of the family, religious affiliation, professional status of parents, income, educational needs and location, just to name a few.  The first step to creating the plan is simply sitting down together and talking.  If parents were unable to open the lines of communication during marriage, this might be an even harder task now.  But both sides must remember that the children’s needs and best interests are the priority and they come first in the parenting plan.  With that in mind, below are some essential issues that every plan should have, along with some extra ideas that families might want to consider for their plan.

A schedule for the children

This is a schedule for the children for school vacations, national and religious holidays and day-to-day living.  In the ideal, it looks towards the future, so schedules can be created on a yearly basis, with holidays and visitation days switching each year (ie Mom has the children for Christmas in odd years and Dad has them for summer holidays in even years).

Decision Making

A good plan should determine the authority and responsibilities of each parent.  The parenting plan should determine who makes which decisions.  Some parents decide that when the children are with a parent, that parent makes day to day decisions.   For young children, this might include what they eat, how often they bathe, how homework is done and when they go to sleep.  For older children decision-making will involve issues of computer and cell phone use, dating, curfews, car use and more.

The plan should also consider long-term, “bigger” decisions and give authority to either one or both parents on matters like education, health, extracurricular activities and religious upbringing.  The parents might agree that regardless of how decision-making is divided up, either parent is allowed to make emergency decisions regarding the children’s health or safety.

Taking care of the children

The parenting plan should take into account specific parenting responsibilities.  Sometimes issues come up because both parents want to be involved (for example, meeting the child’s teacher) and sometimes neither parent is able to take responsibility (for example, who stays home when a child is sick).   What about medical and dental appointments, or transporting the children between homes?   Whether there is one child or four, these questions come up regularly.  Some plans state that the parent in charge that day is responsible for these tasks.  Other plans use the “divide and conquer” method, giving dad all medical and dental tasks, say, while mom deals with all educational responsibilities.

A Method for Communicating and Sharing Information

Despite all the effort, parents will need to communicate with each other and share information.  Online calendars and schedules that can be shared and updated are a great method for keeping each other informed of changes.   Emailing and text messages enable fast communication when a quick decision needs to be made.  The plan should detail the method or methods chosen and the expectation that parents will make every effort to keep each other in the loop.

Financial Responsibility

Laying out the financial commitments and rights of each parent is an important part of the plan.  If one parent is paying child support, the plan should explain what this includes.  The plan should also determine who covers additional expenses for the children like summer camp, public transportation, special activities and pocket money.  Are both parents paying into a college or savings fund for each child?  How much should each parent put aside?  Every family is different so parents should sit down and work through as many of the expenses they currently have or foresee having in the future.

A Way to Manage Disagreements

No plan is perfect and sometimes disagreements arise.  Parents need to have a method in place for working through these disagreements.  The plan can require parents to first try working it out on their own or turning to mediation.  When parents can’t resolve their differences, arbitration may be required.  These are preferred alternatives to court because they allow each parent to be heard and help the parents hand-craft a solution that satisfies everyone.  Generally, court should be the last resort.

Evaluating and Changing the Plan

Parents and children change over time.  Sometimes it will be necessary to make changes to the parenting plan.  What happens when one parent needs to relocate?   What happens when the children get a bit older and want to make changes to the plan?  The plan should have a system for dealing with the changing needs of the family members.  Some plans require an evaluation every year.   Others might require a family discussion to get input from everyone involved.  Whatever the approach, it should be described in the parenting plan  and followed. The new plan can also be submitted to the court for orders.

An experienced family lawyer can help families create a plan that’s appropriate for them.  Below are some suggested templates for a parenting plan. Contact Mathews Family Law today to discuss your parenting plan with a specialist family law lawyer.

The Family Act 1975 ensures that children maintain their relationships with both parents and guarantees both parents the right to spend time with their children, all in the best interests of the children. One of the major objectives of the Act is to ensure that “children have the benefit of both of their parents having a meaningful involvement in their lives, to the maximum extent consistent with the best interests of the child”.

Today there is an assumption of shared parental responsibility between parents for their children. This responsibility includes all of the “duties, powers, responsibilities and authority” which parents have by law regarding their children. Section 61DA states that when a court makes a parenting order, it “must apply a presumption that it is in the best interests of the child for the child’s parents to have equal shared parental responsibility for the child”. While the child may live primarily with one parent, both parents have a role in his or her ongoing, daily life.

“Equal” time v. “substantial and significant” time

If parents have shared responsibility for their children, they should also have shared time with their children. But how much time is the right amount? How much is fair to each parent? And what is reasonable to expect from the parents and from the children?

The law requires the court to first consider providing “equal” time to each parent.  A schedule with equal time might involve children living with the mother one week, then the father the next week. In some families, the children may spend Sunday through Wednesday at their father’s home and Wednesday night through Sunday morning with their mother. The court weighs two factors in order to determine if the child should have equal time with each parent. The court must ask if spending time with each parent is in the child’s best interests and is “reasonably practicable“? A court might very well determine that it’s best for the child to have equal shared time with each parent but since they live 300 miles away from each other, this is not feasible. Only if both of the above criteria are met can a court consider giving a parenting order that grants equal time with the children.

If there is (or will be) a court order giving shared responsibility to both parents, but the court does not grant an order for equal time, the court can consider giving an order for “substantial and significant” time. Again, the considerations for giving this type of order are whether this is in the best interests of the child and whether it’s practical.

If there is a conflict between what is good for the child and what is fair to the parents, the child’s welfare comes first.

What is “reasonably practicable”?

The court will weigh a number of issues to decide if it is practical for the parents to have equal time or substantial time with the children. These include:

• The distance between the two homes. If one parent lives in Perth and the other in Sydney, equal time will be difficult to establish.
• The parents’ present and future ability to work out an arrangement for the children to spend equal or substantial time with each parent. For example, in a case in the United States

What is “substantial and significant time”?

The law also clearly delineates what substantial and significant time is, making it clear to the courts what the parenting services order should include and letting parents know ahead of time what is to be expected. Significant time goes beyond a nice weekend together once a month, or dinner every Wednesday night. Parents who are given substantial and significant are expected to:

•  spend time with their children on days that fall on weekends and holidays as well as regular weekdays;
• be involved with the children’s daily routine;
• be present at occasions and events that are significant to the children (school graduation, a visiting day at camp or school, dance recitals, end-of-year sports games, etc.).

Similarly, the parent needs to include the children in events and occasions he or she considers significant (special events at work, promotions, birthdays).

The court can also consider many other factors in determining if the children are spending substantial and significant time with the non-custodial parent.

See the child custody blog for recent cases and legislative changes on issues of parenting and shared time.

A child born to a lesbian couple will generally have a birth mother and a lesbian co-mother. The current family law system recognizes the birth mother as a legal parent.

A child born to a gay couple will often have a birth father and a gay co-father, as well as a birth mother.

Alternatively, a child may have two gay co-fathers as well as a birth mother. If there is a birth father, he will be a legal parent along with the birth mother.

The lesbian co-mother or gay co-father(s) can apply to the Family Court of Australia for a parenting order, as ‘other people significant to the care, welfare and development’ of the child. But the lesbian co-mother and gay co-father(s) will be treated in the same way as a social parent is treated under the law, they will not be treated in the same way as a birth parent.

A partial resolution to this issue if for the co-parents to apply to adopt the child, this step will entitle the co-parent to many of the rights of a legal parent.

This issue is of particular concern to a gay couple who are both listed as co-fathers, neither member of the couple is a legal parent. Adoption is important in order to enable at least one parent to be a legal parent.

The Court will consider the length of the relationship, your living arrangements, how you arranged your finances and property ownership, whether there was a sexual relationship, whether or not you had or cared for children and the way you presented your relationship in public.

You can make an application for a property settlement under the Family Law Act if any of the following apply:

• your same sex relationship lasted for at least 2 years;
• you have a child with your partner; and
• you have made a substantial contribution to the property or finances of your partner.

The same laws about property apply whether or not you were married or in a same sex relationship. You can start negotiations about property as soon as the relationship has broken down.

In a same sex relationship, you must commence property or maintenance proceedings within two years of your separation.

For relationships that break down after 1 March 2009, new laws apply under the Family Law Act.

The same legal principles that apply to financial settlements between parties to a marriage are now applied to settlements between same sex couples.

Superannuation can be split between same sex couples following their relationship breakdown. Spousal maintenance can also be ordered.

Cases between same sex couples pertaining to their legal or adopted children have been regulated by the Family Law Act since 1988.

A child born to a lesbian couple will generally have a birth mother and a lesbian co-mother. The current family law system recognizes the birth mother as a legal parent.

A child born to a gay couple will often have a birth father and a gay co-father, as well as a birth mother. Alternatively, a child may have two gay co-fathers as well as a birth mother. If there is a birth father, he will be a legal parent along with the birth mother.

The lesbian co-mother or gay co-father(s) can apply to the Family Court of Australia for a parenting order, as ‘other people significant to the care, welfare and development of the child. But the lesbian co-mother and gay co-father(s) will be treated in the same way as a social parent is treated under the law, they will not be treated in the same way as a birth parent.

A person who is a later partner of a birth mother or birth father is not viewed any differently than a person in a same-sex couple who is either the partner of the birth mother or birth father or an active co-parent at the time a child is born. A partial resolution to this issue is for the co-parents to apply to adopt the child, this step will entitle the co-parent to many of the rights of a legal parent.

This issue is of particular concern to a gay couple who are both listed as co-fathers. Adoption is important in order to enable at least one parent to be a legal parent.

The laws relating to property settlement at the end of a same sex couple relationship have recently changed. For relationships that have broken down since 1 March 2009, the Family Court now deals with all of the legal aspects of the separation, including any:

• Child Support Agreement,
• Parenting Plan or
• Parenting Order.

One of the most important, and perhaps the most difficult, issue facing couples who separate is the question of ‘who gets what?’ The Family Law Act provides for property settlements same sex couples. Most property settlements are dealt with by the Federal Circuit Court or the Family Court.

The laws relating to property settlement at the end of a same sex couple relationship have recently changed. For relationships that have broken down since 1 March 2009, the Court now deals with all of the legal aspects of the separation, including any parenting agreement, property settlement and maintenance. As a result, parties to relationships that have broken down after 1 March 2009 may have more extensive entitlements than they would have had under state law.

Depending on the length and dynamic of the relationship, as well as the way that the parties have arranged their finances, a property settlement can be quite simple or involve complex negotiations.

Both financial and non-financial contributions are taken into account when determining de facto property division. The new changes to de facto laws now allow for future needs and superannuation splitting arrangements to be considered as well. The Court will consider the financial and non-financial contributions made by each party and divide the property in a manner that is just and equitable.

Strict time limits apply to commencing property settlement proceedings in a Court. You must apply for a Court Order within two years from the date your same sex couple relationship ends. It is important that you seek proper legal advice as soon as possible.

The family law property lawyers at Mathews Family Law & Mediation Specialists Melbourne understand the difficulties involved and the unique nature of individual relationships. We have extensive experience negotiating property settlements for couples who have a substantial asset pool, such as a major property/share portfolio or a family business. We understand both the emotional and the commercial implications of splitting assets. We are committed to ensuring a fair settlement is achieved as quickly as possible, we aim to reduce the time taken and therefore the cost to you.

Mathews Family Law is a leading Australian family law firm. Please contact us on +61 3 9804 7991 to speak with our family and divorce lawyers today. You can also send through your enquiry online now and we will contact you shortly.

Separation Agreements are a type of Binding Financial Agreement. A separation Agreement is entered into in anticipation of, or at the conclusion of a same sex couple relationship. These Agreements can provide for the division of the parties’ property and maintenance.